GIVING THANKS, THE PINEY POWER WAY

Hard to believe but true...in this hi-tech age, there are parts of New Jersey without cable-TV.  Some areas are so isolated, primarily sections of the Pine Barrens, that the economics of extending the necessary wiring to these sparsely populated outposts, isn't profitable.

THE PINE BARRENS ARE THE LARGEST BODY OF OPEN LAND IN THE MID-ATLANTIC SEABOARD,  (1.1 MILLION ACRES OR 22% OF NEW JERSEY'S LAND).  MARKED BY HEAVILY FORESTED, SANDY, ACIDIC, NUTRIENT POOR SOIL, THESE CONDITIONS ENABLE A UNIQUE AND DIVERSE SPECTRUM OF PLANTS...EVEN ORCHIDS AND CARNIVOROUS PLANTS TO FLOURISH. 

One of my loyal MGTP readers, Woodrow "Woody" Pace lives in this present-day wilderness.  On the eve of Turkey Day, he told me the odd circumstances of why he is so thankful.  So while the last few glowing embers of Thanksgiving are still warm within us, I share his timely story of appreciation with you.

Pace is a self professed, "hardcore piney."  Most pinies (residents of the Pine Barrens) look and act like everyone else.  They don't rely on fresh road kill for meals and have all their teeth (or like Woody, have a decent dental plan at work).  However, some pinies are indeed hillbilly-like folks who live in the tiny municipal dots of the ecologically preserved interior of South Jersey. 

A vanishing breed, many pinies relocate but almost no newcomers move in to take their place.  As for the overwhelming amount of rednecks who stay, they take pride in their "piney power" and yesteryear lifestyles.

About fifteen years ago Woody Pace got divorced.  In order to maximize keeping his income, Pace started working a couple of nights (off the books) at the Cranberry Roadhouse, (the only bar in his tiny town).  The owner, Jimmy G. was from the richest family in that part of the undeveloped territory. 

Jimmy G's clan was from a long line of pineland bankers and lawyers whose roots could be traced through Philadelphia and further back to the Mayflower.  Jimmy was set to follow in his pedigree's dynamic footsteps but due to audacious behavior as a result of acute alcoholism, he was kicked out of two Ivy League colleges as well as Penn State and Georgetown. 

In the mid-70's, rather than take his riches anywhere else in the world, Jimmy G. without a shred of ambition, returned to the pinelands.  He bought a ramshackle drinking hole, (the only tavern for miles around) and drank himself into a nightly stupor for twenty-plus years.

Woody described Jimmy G. as a real life, "ARTHUR," (as in the 1981 romantic comedy starring Dudley Moore, Liza Minnelli and John Gielgud).  Which meant that despite Jimmy being a genius, he wasn't motivated by the idea of work, responsibility, more money or power.  He was just content to idly laugh his way through life and party along side his friends and customers.

Click on the link below to see Christopher Cross' four-minute theme from, "ARTHUR."
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcwLrEATXH4

One could say, like Arthur, Jimmy was caught in the pinelands which is somewhere, "between the moon and New York City."

ARTHUR WAS A CHILDISH, SPOILED, BUT LOVABLE, FILTHY RICH DRUNKARD.  ADS FOR THE MOVIE ASKED, "DON'T YOU WISH YOU WERE ARTHUR?"

Jimmy G's "impaired" driving was usually ignored by the local police.  Still, he had a  laundry list of liquor-related traffic offenses...and the cops made it clear that they were tired of covering for him.

Woody was nineteen and unaware of Jimmy's mounting legal predicament as he saw a car veer off the blackened, back road and plow into the woods. Woody went to help.  He didn't recognize the semi-conscious victim until he pulled Jimmy G's bloodied body from the scraped-up, showroom new Corvette.

Jimmy G. was blithering drunken nonsense as Woody struggled to transfer the boozer's dead weight into his pick-up truck, (the one with the piney-chic bumper sticker that read; I DON'T BRAKE FOR ANYTHING).  Jimmy's incoherent droning continued for the two-mile drive back to his lonely bachelor house. 

Woody was thrilled that Jimmy didn't puke in his truck as he dumped the sot on the sofa and whispered, "Want me to call anyone?"  Between burps, Jimmy's first clear statement was, "No, I'm okay...but don't tell anyone...and...take this." When Woody saw he was given a hundred dollar bill he said, "No, I can't..."  But Jimmy interrupted, "Take it, this'll be our little secret. I'll just tell everyone I ran into the Jersey Devil."

THE PINE BARRENS GAVE RISE TO THE LEGEND OF THE MONSTROUS JERSEY DEVIL,  THE THIRTEENTH CHILD OF A WOMAN FROM NEARBY LEEDS POINT, IN 1735.  MOST ALLEGED SIGHTINGS OF THE BEAST HAVE OCCURRED IN OR NEAR THE PINELANDS.

Woody drove back to the accident scene.  He pulled away as many rocks and branches as he could before gingerly backing Jimmy's scratched and dented car out of the woods.  He drove it back to Jimmy's. It was 4:00AM after Woody walked back two miles, retrieved his truck and went home.

The hundred dollar bill part of the story reminded me of a passage from the novel, "THE JUNGLE."

UPTON SINCLAIR (1878-1968)  WROTE "THE JUNGLE," IN 1906.  IT WAS INTENDED TO BE A SOCIALIST'S VISION OF BIAS AGAINST IMMIGRANTS BY AMERICAN SOCIETY.  HOWEVER THE BOOK CATAPULTED REFORMS SUCH AS CHILD LABOR LAWS, FOOD PURIFICATION STANDARDS AND WORKMEN SAFETY REQUIREMENTS. 

The Jungle involved the turn of the 20th century struggles of Lithuanian immigrant Jurgis (YOOR-HEEZ) Rudkus who worked for "wage slavery," in the Chicago stockyards.  Jurgis and his family represent the hopelessness of the non-English speaking working class.  They are already living on the cusp of poverty when Jurgis gets severely injured on the job.  Without social programs, benefits or any rights, he is fired. 

Jurgis' already difficult life spirals uncontrollably downward. He becomes so desperate that for the price of a couple of drinks (ten cents) Jurgis allows himself to be bribed (numerous times), to vote for a corrupt politician.  A melee ensues and Jurgis innocently saves Freddie Jones, (a drunken Arthur-like character) from hooligans. I'm guessing that this concept inspired (was stolen?) by the "Arthur" author. 

Wealthy Jones takes Jurgis to his parent's mansion to wine and dine his new friend. The reader is led to believe that this will be Jurgis' salvation.  But when Freddie's family comes home and sees their son entertaining a limping, stinking vagrant, Jurgis is given the bum's rush, (thrown out).  But not before Jones gives Jurgis a hundred dollar bill and tells the chauffeur to drop him anywhere he wants.

Jurgis is homeless.  He asks to be taken to the bar next to where the voting fraud occurred.  He orders a beer.  The bartender sees him as a tramp and demands to see the cash, (a nickel), first.  Intoxicated and naive, Jurgis smacks down the hundred dollar bill.  The opportunistic bartender drugs Jurgis, steals the money and gets him arrested.  When Jurgis gets out, he returns to his new friend but Freddie Jones (now sober) has no memory of the presumed beggar standing in front of him.

I was starting to worry that Woody's hundred dollar bill was going to give his Thanksgiving story have a horrible ending like, "The Jungle." 

Woody continued by saying, "Back in the day, I was a regular, underage drinker at the Cranberry Roadhouse.  In a short time, me and Jimmy were kind of friendly.  The crash was never mentioned...but when he was behind the bar, I was never charged for drinks...for over twenty years."

In 1998, Woody confided in Jimmy G. about his divorce situation.  He added that he could use some pocket money especially on custody days with his kid. Woody then asked if he could tend bar a couple of days a week. Jimmy shrugged, "Sure."

At about the same time, Jimmy started coming to work less frequently.  The rumor was he was sick. Less than a year later, he died from liver disease associated with alcoholism, Jimmy G. was fifty-three.

Woody seemed to go off-topic when he reminded me that in the most rural corners of the pinelands, there is a tremendous limitation on where to entertain a toddler. Luckily, Woody's son loved "Piney Paradise," one of the new, locally built and funded, interactive playgrounds springing up in just about every town.

THE INTERACTIVE PLAYGROUND IN  MY NEIGHBORHOOD, "IMAGINATION STATION" WAS BUILT IN 1997. SINCE THEN, IT HAS EXPANDED AND NOW INCLUDES PATRIOT LAKE, A SKATE PARK, A GAZEBO-SHAPED BAND SHELL AND VOLLEY-BALL COURTS.

One day, construction started on new additions at Piney Paradise.  The three-pronged project included; a faux log cabin with modern restrooms, a rustic bench-lined path looping a nearby pond and a weedy marsh was cleared for six picnic tables.  When the job was finished, a Victorian-styled plaque was placed at the junction of all three that read: IN LOVING MEMORY OF JIMMY G.  Which meant that Jimmy's family donated all the money.

Woody showed the sign to his little son.  He explained that his boss Jimmy G. was a great man and that he went to heaven.  Then he said, "We should pray for Jimmy G."  For the next year (twenty plus times) Woody and his son would kneel at the plaque and pray.

The two Pace boys were at the Piney Power Farmers Market when Woody spotted Jimmy G's elderly mother.  Woody went over and shook Mrs. G's hand and said to his four-year old, "You know who this is...it's Jimmy G's mom."  The little boy beamed, "We pray for Jimmy G. when we go to the park."

A week later, there was a knock on Woody's apartment door.  A messenger hand delivered an official looking envelope addressed to Woodrow T. Pace.  Inside was a letter from an attorney letter asking him to telephone for an appointment.  He assumed his ex found a new lawyer who was going to bust his balls for more alimony.

He waited a week before making the dreaded call.  The secretary gave him no information other than, "An anonymous source has set up a college fund for your son."

Earlier this week, Woody and his son began shopping for colleges.  Woody told me, "My dad's dad had a tough life as a migrant blueberry picker during the depression.  His son (my dad) lived in Fortesque and did better as a fisherman on the Maurice River.  As for me, the casinos have given me, a still better life.  But through the gift of education, my son can get out of the pinelands and do better than all of us."

Woody Pace still doesn't have cable-TV but he's thankful to Jimmy G. and his family for fronting the first $50,000.00 of hos son's tuition.

THE OTHER, CRIME OF THE CENTURY !

The assassination of President John F. Kennedy was the crime of the twentieth century.  Still shrouded by mystery, it's unclear whether this heinous act was perpetrated by a demented, lone gunman or a complicated, multi-tiered conspiracy.  The bottom line is, the beloved leader of our country was gunned down in broad daylight...in front of countless spectators.

Today, history books reflect that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone.  Yet nearly half of the American public (and the world) are convinced that Oswald was indeed set-up as a patsy by a complex team that concocted a scheme with perhaps three shooters.  Plus, "they" had the power and resources to set-up a profound, ever-lasting cover-up.

WHO KILLED JFK?  WHILE SCIENCE SEEMS TO PROVE THE CASE FOR A LONE GUNMAN,  THE MAGNITUDE OF THE CRIME MAKES IT PSYCHOLOGICALLY DIFFICULT TO ACCEPT SUCH A GREAT MAN BEING "HIT" BY SUCH A NOBODY.  WE MAY NEVER KNOW THE TRUTH BECAUSE THE FIRST BRICK IN THE CONSPIRACY THEORISTS WALL WAS THE FIRST MURDER EVER ON LIVE TV, (I WITNESSED IT WITH MY SISTER AND GRANDMOTHER), WHEN JACK RUBY (above) EXECUTED (SHUT-UP)  OSWALD.

My heart screams out conspiracy.  In 1976, I visited Dealey Plaza in Dallas.  Fate drew me behind the fence on the grassy knoll...and its impossible to think that any serious gun-related attack wouldn't have included a shooter there. But on the other hand, my head has seen independent scientific proof that has disproved this common assertion.

I TOOK THIS (FADED) PICTURE FROM A HIT MAN'S PERSPECTIVE,  (BEHIND THE FENCE ON THE GRASSY KNOLL) .  THE  STRETCH OF ROADWAY (center) IS THE KILL-ZONE WHERE JFK WAS GUNNED DOWN.  I ADMIT IT'S NOT SUCH A GOOD "SHOT." BUT WHEN YOU ARE STANDING BACK THERE...YOU CAN'T IMAGINE  A SERIOUS SNIPER ATTEMPT COMING FROM AT LEAST THERE.  I WAS CONVINCED ENOUGH THAT THIS WAS THE ONLY PHOTO I TOOK OF THE CRIME SCENE.

In three days, (November 22nd), the dubious 49th anniversary of the Kennedy tragedy will be marked.  However, I believe it would be better to wait till next year (the 50th anniversary) to really examine the case.  So with that in mind, I say let's defer to what was considered the "crime of the century" prior to 1963.

Surprisingly, (to the uninitiated), the other crime of the century took place here in New Jersey, in 1932.  Even stranger, (insert "IT'S A SMALL WORLD," sound track), the evil deed took place only a few miles from where my son Andrew goes to school, The College of New Jersey (TCNJ).

First, let's go back to May 20th and 21st in 1927. That's when Charles "Lucky Lindy" Lindbergh (1902-1974) rose from virtual obscurity as an air mail pilot to instantaneous world fame.  He did it by being the first to solo his airplane (The Spirit of St. Louis) across the Atlantic Ocean (3600 miles) from Garden City, Long Island, New York to Paris France.

LINDBERGH'S ACCOMPLISHMENT EARNED HIM THE MEDAL OF HONOR...AMERICA'S HIGHEST MILITARY DECORATION.

The whole world was enraptured.  When the twenty-five year old native of Little Falls Wisconsin returned to the states, New York City honored his feat of heroism with a ticker tape parade.

IN THE LATE 1920's, CHARLES LINDBERGH WAS GIVEN ROCK STAR STATUS.  HE WAS SO LOVED AND ADMIRED THAT HE WAS PROBABLY THE SINGLE MOST RECOGNIZED INDIVIDUAL ON THE PLANET.

In the years that followed, Lindbergh capitalized on his renown by promoting and developing commercial aviation as well as air mail service.  But his skyrocket to positive fame took a nosedive on March 1, 1932 when his first child (of thirteen), Charles A. Lindbergh Jr., was abducted from his East Amwell New Jersey farmhouse, (near Hopewell).

ALL THE WORLD'S SYMPATHIES WENT OUT TO THE LINDBERGH'S 

Two months later, Lindbergh's "Lucky Lindy" nickname lost its cleverness forever when the body of his 20-month-old toddler was discovered a short distance from their house.  The cause of death was determined to be a massive skull fracture.

Over the next two-plus years, an investigation led to the arrest of German-born, Bruno Richard Hauptmann.

HAUPTMANN (1899-1936) HAD A SPOTTY RECORD IN THE GERMAN ARMY DURING WWI.  AFTER THE WAR, HE SPENT THREE YEARS IN PRISON FOR ARMED ROBBERY AND OTHER OFFENSES.  WHEN HE GOT OUT, HE SERVED MORE TIME FOR ADDITIONAL BURGLARIES.

Hauptmann was a stowaway and entered the USA illegally in 1923.  He settled in Manhattan, worked as a carpenter, got married and had a child. 

Two years after the Lindbergh's paid the $50,000.00 ransom, (September 1934), New Jersey and New York police together with the FBI followed a string of evidence to Hauptmann's residence.  A high speed car chase through the Bronx ensued until the accused was apprehended.

Hauptmann was dubbed, "The Most Hated Man in the World," as the court proceedings began in Flemington New Jersey.  Journalist H. L. Mencken called the trial, "The biggest story since the resurrection." 

The damning evidence included:

• Some of the marked ransom money ($14,590.00) was found in Hauptmann's garage.
• Handwriting samples matched the ransom note and Hauptmann's pre-trial specimens. 
• The wooden, homemade ladder used to reach the second floor window of the baby's room was consistent with the slats from Hauptmann's attic floor. 
• The ransom intermediary's phone number was scribbled into Hauptmann's closet wall. 
• Although Hauptmann was largely unemployed at the time, he had recently bought a $400.00 radio and had enough money to send his wife to Germany. 
• Eye-witnesses testified that they saw him in East Amwell in the days before the kidnapping. 
• Local merchants identified him as using marked ransom money (rare gold certificates).
• He was absent from work the day of the crime and quit two days later.

Hauptmann never wavered and denied his guilt.  But many of his alibis and excuses were proven to be false.  Still his defense argued that all the evidence was circumstantial; there were no reliable witnesses at the scene, no fingerprints; on the ladder, ransom notes or in the victim's nursery.

Six weeks later, the jury brought in a verdict of guilty.  The judge sentenced Bruno Richard Hauptmann to death on March 18, 1935.  Several delays later, on April 3, 1936 at the New Jersey State Prison in Trenton, Hauptmann was placed in "Old Smokey" and electrocuted.  His last words through an interpreter were, "I'm absolutely innocent of the crime with which I am burdened."

Throughout the years, there has been much doubt as to Hauptmann's guilt. Similar to the polarization of the John F. Kennedy assassination, many people feel that the universal popularity of Charles Lindbergh and the rising anti-German sentiments caused over-zealous, "concerned" citizens to fabricate damning testimony.  It was also asserted that the police beat Hauptmann while he was in custody and intimidated other witnesses to contaminate evidence.  Similarly, in the Kennedy case Jack Ruby (considered an unreliable and self-serving source) said of killing Oswald, "It helped the city of Dallas redeem itself in the eyes of the public and that Oswald's death would spare Mrs. Kennedy the discomfiture of coming back for a trail."

In the Lindbergh trial some of the tampering included;

• Lying about the wood from the homemade ladder coming from Hauptmann's attic. 
• The Superintendent of the New Jersey Police, Norman Schwarzkopf, Sr., (father of Desert Storm General, Norman Schwarzkopf, Jr.), refused to make public that Hauptmann's fingerprints were not on the ladder.  Please note that Schwarzkopf's name (in small print) appears on the "wanted" poster (above) as a contact person.
• A reporter admitted that he scrawled the ransom deliveryman's phone number in Hauptmann's closet.
• One eye-witness who positively identified him near the Lindbergh estate was legally blind.
• It was also asserted that Hauptmann's time card at work was doctored and that coworkers statements that he was at work were ignored.

Hauptmann's widow Anna, lived until 1994. In 1982, she sued the state of New Jersey, various police officers, Hearst newspapers that published pre-trial articles insisting on Hauptmann's guilt and former prosecutor David T. Wilentz (then 86) for over $100 million, in wrongful death damages, (all of which were dismissed).

On numerous occasions, even after fifty years, Mrs. Hauptmann unsuccessfully lobbied to have the verdict reversed, to clear her husband's name.  One of her last pleas (1990) was denied by NJ Governor, James Florio, (one of the few notable TCNJ graduates I ever heard of).

Charles Lindbergh, after the trial, relieved the pressure and unwanted day-to-day notoriety by relocating (hiding) his family to Europe.  In 1939, they returned.  In the early years of WWII, he was an outspoken advocate of keeping the U. S. out of the war.  But after Pearl Harbor, he changed his mind and flew many combat missions in the Pacific.

Both sides of the puzzling Lindbergh case have been depicted in books and movies.  Either way, like Kennedy, the deeper you look, the harder it becomes to decide what is true.  The story only gets sadder.

*

Special thanks to NJPHIL and SKIP for reminding me of Central New Jersey's role in history. For instance, General George Washington's daring 1776 crossing of the Delaware River happened in nearby Washington Crossing NJ, (near New Hope PA).

EMANUEL LEUTZE'S 1851 OIL PAINTING OF THE DECEMBER 25th AND 26th CROSSING, IN THE DEAD OF WINTER, PRIOR TO THE AMERICAN SURPRISE ATTACK ON THE HESSIAN FORCES IN TRENTON.

More Central New Jersey tidbits include, Federal City NJ (a town between TCNJ and East Amwell) was seriously considered as our nation's capital. 

In 1916, three shark attacks killed four people, Beach Haven (July 1st), Spring Lake (July 6th) and Matawan Creek (July 12th).

MORE THAN A HALF CENTURY LATER, PETER BENCHLEY WAS INSPIRED TO WRITE THE NOVEL, "JAWS."THE ONLY THINGS MORE FRIGHTENING AROUND HERE THAN THAT BOOK AND MOVIE WAS THE SUPER STORM SANDY AND TV's "JERSEY SHORE."

Oh the humanity!  Lest we forget Lakehurst New Jersey (1936) and the ill-fated zeppelin Hindenburg.  This lethal, fiery explosion with heavy political implications was first disaster broadcast on live radio. 

Three years later, the radio again played a pivotal role in rattling a lot of people. That's when the 1938 Halloween-themed radio program, "THE WAR OF THE WORLD'S" was broadcast.

H.G. WELLES' "WAR OF THE WORLDS," WAS ADAPTED ON CBS RADIO BY THE MERCURY THEATER TROUPE, (HEADED BY ORSON WELLES).   IF LISTENERS MISSED THE  INTRODUCTION'S DISCLAIMER, THE SHOW'S NEWS BULLETIN FORMAT MADE A MARTIAN INVASION OF GROVERS MILL NJ SEEM REAL.

See you next year with some illuminating commentary on the Kennedy assassination.

VETERAN'S DAY, HOPE AND THE USO

Armistice Day! November 11, 1918 celebrated the end of WWI, (the peace treaty was signed at the eleventh hour, of the eleventh day, of the eleventh month).  After WWII, the name of the holiday was changed to Veteran's Day and its aim changed, to acknowledge all U. S. military personnel.

THE TOMB OF THE UNKNOWN SOLDIER, IN ARLINGTON NATIONAL CEMETERY.  MOST OF THE GOVERNMENT WAS SHUT-DOWN BY LAST WEEK'S SUPER STORM, HURRICANE SANDY...BUT THIS GROUP OF FEDERAL EMPLOYEES STILL WENT TO THE OFFICE.

My dad served in the United States Army.  He rose to the rank of corporal while stationed in Italy after WWII (1946-1947).  His primary duty was being in the band corps.  He toured the war-ravaged country and played the saxophone, flute or clarinet while entertaining troops or performing during military functions.

BACK IN '46, MY SOULFUL SAX-DADDY WAS SAID TO HAVE INSPIRED BOTH CLARENCE CLEMONS AND KENNETH "BLEEDING GUMS" MURPHY.

In the late 80's on the 4th of July, my parents came to visit my wife and I in South Jersey.  We capped the holiday festivities by watching a patriotic concert in Cape May.  This part of the celebration pleased my dad especially when the band members took their position on the gazebo and warmed up.  I always pictured my folks relocating to my area and him joining a similar, neighborhood band.

At the specified time, the band leader introduced his troupe and said, "This year, we decided to try something different...so we won't be playing the typical Independence Day fare."

Unfortunately for my dad, the maestro wasn't kidding.  By the third selection, the look of disappointment on my father's face was incredible.  We stayed till the end and other than the, "National Anthem," nary an old favorite of dad was played...not even a modern variation on John Philip Souza's, "STARS AND STRIPES FOREVER." 

Click on the link below to hear the best patriotic piece of music EVER !

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4v9Da5DpYo

Years earlier, the height of my craps dealing career in Las Vegas was marked by nearly two years (1980-1982), working at the Stardust Casino. In that time, I caught at least a glimpse of several celebrities who gambled or walked through the joint.  The most noteworthy was, Bob Hope.

Hope came into our craps pit.  He was about 77 and wasn't wearing make-up.  While he chatted with our pit boss, I made the wisecrack that he looked like he was 150 years old.  Then one of my Vietnam veteran coworkers got in my grill and told me that Bob Hope was one of the greatest American patriots that ever lived...and told me why!

ON THE LEFT, LESLIE TOWNES HOPE (AKA BOB HOPE) (1903-2003) WAS AN ENGLISH-BORN, AMERICAN ACTOR, COMEDIAN WHO MADE HIS MARK ON BROADWAY, VAUDEVILLE, RADIO, MOVIES AND TV.  IN THE MOVIE, "SON OF PALEFACE" (above) HE SAYS ONE OF MY FAVORITE IN LINES AFTER ORDERING MILK IN A TOUGH SALOON.  WHEN ALL THE ORNERY HOMBRES GIVES HIM THE STINK-EYE HE ADDS, "AND PUT IT IN A DIRTY GLASS."

A short list of Hope's credits include; appearing in seventy films and shorts, hosting the academy awards fourteen times, authoring fourteen books and even being a minority owner of baseball's Cleveland Indians.  But it's universally agreed that he is most famous for his work with the USO.

THE UNITED SERVICE ORGANIZATIONS (USO) WAS SUGGESTED  BY FRANKLIN ROOSEVELT IN 1941.  THIS NONPROFIT GROUP PROVIDES PROGRAMS, SERVICES AND ENTERTAINMENT DESIGNED TO LIFT THE SPIRITS OF TROOPS AND THEIR FAMILIES. 

The USO was congressionally chartered but is not a government agency.  However, together with the defense department, the USO originated as a cooperative effort between; the SALVATION ARMY, YMCA, YWCA, NATIONAL CATHOLIC SERVICES, the NATIONAL JEWISH WELFARE BOARD and TRAVELERS AID.  The USO relies on private contributions for funds, goods and services from individuals and corporate donors.

Today, the USO still operates 160+ centers worldwide.  It originally gained prominence by developing a tradition of aiding and entertaining during WWII as a GI's, "home away from home."  Soon Hollywood got in the act and the USO expanded from free coffee, card games and ping pong tables, to the notion of live "camp shows."

The genius of the camp show was, it boosted the morale of the troops because the most popular entertainers of the day showed their patriotism and support by giving their time and skill, (sometimes in war zones or under other hazardous conditions).

Hollywood brought a sense of home to the troops.  Movie historian Steve Cohan said, "Most of all...in taking 'home' on the road, the USO equated the nation to show business.  The shows exported home to the soldiers...with a sense of patriotic identification with America through entertainment." 

LOOK magazine stated; For the little time the show lasts, the fighting men are taken straight back to Main Street. 

Actor George Raft said, "Now, it's time like they had back home."

One of the USO's promotional slogans included; The camp shows belong to the American people, for it is their contribution that made it possible.  It is an important part of life of your sons, brothers, husbands and sweethearts.

From 1941 to 1947, the USO presented more than 400,000 performances, featuring entertainers such as Bing Crosby, Judy Garland, Bette Davis, Humphrey Bogart, Lauren Bacall, Frank Sinatra, Marlene Dietrich, Hattie McDaniel, Eubie Blake, Ann Sheridan, Laurel and Hardy, The Marx Brothers, Jack Benny, Larry Adler, Ossy Renardy, Zero Mostel, James Cagney, James Stewart, Gary Cooper, Doraine and Ellis, Lena Horne, Danny Kaye, The Rockettes, Al Jolson, Fred Astaire, Curly Joe DeRita, The Andrews Sisters, Joe E. Brown, Joe E. Lewis, Ray Bolger, Lucille Ball, Glenn Miller, Martha Raye, Mickey Rooney, Betty Hutton, Dinah Shore, and most famously, Bob Hope.

BOB HOPE (above in 1944) WAS THE USO KING.  HE DID 57 USO TOURS (1942-1988).  IN 1996 HE WAS DECLARED THE FIRST (AND ONLY) HONORARY VETERAN OF THE U. S. ARMED FORCES.

My Stardust coworker's enthusiasm was its sharpest when he finished by saying, "Throughout my Bob Hope USO show, the laughter usually drowned out the (nearby) artillery explosions."

I realized my mistake.  From that moment on, I respected  Bob Hope as a hero and national treasure.

Mr. Hope out-lived my father by eight years.  He was still entertaining well into his eighties and even got to see his hundredth birthday.

I don't recall my dad ever mentioning his own connection with the USO...I just hope he did perform with them...and I forgot that he told me.

Please, today and everyday, recognize and appreciate Veterans Day!  And regardless of your politics, don't take our country's volunteers who are now, fighting, getting wounded and dying in the furthest, most remote outposts on the planet for granted.   Because those brave hearts are the only ones separating us from a draft...and violent protests in streets, to prevent everyone's sons and daughters being at risk.

THE SHINIEST OF TWO TURDS

There is no better time, (the eve of Election Day), to celebrate Kinky Friedman's birthday.  So while we congratulate him, let's also thank this prolific author of humorous detective novels for a couple of his greatest contributions to mankind.  First, referring to the act of defecation as; taking a Nixon.  Second, the encoded and far sillier phrase; mit, mit, mit.

Kinky portrays himself in his books and instructs his assistant (Watson) that if he is held hostage, he will call out; mit, mit, mit.  While his captor will think he's an idiot, for making strange noises, it will really be a warning signal to Watson, (M. I. T. = Man In Danger).

RICHARD "KINKY" FRIEDMAN (NOVEMBER 1, 1944 TO PRESENT),  IS A SINGER, SONG WRITER, NOVELIST AND POLITICAL HOPEFUL, (IN 2006,  HIS BID TO BECOME TEXAS GOVERNOR NETTED HIM 12.6% OF THE VOTE AND A FOURTH PLACE FINISH).

Tomorrow, my son Andrew will have the privilege to vote for the first time.  Plus, he has the added bonus of this being a presidential election year.  But rather than over load my readership with another column about my child, I decided to write about all our children.

Young voters need to be reminded by an objective source (me) that they should remain independent and never exclusively align with a single party.  Ideally, all politicians should be unified and motivated to solve the same problems.  But special interest block this common sense approach to the "greater good" because warring factions can't agree on what the greater good actually is.

The individual issues of the day are too important and wide-ranging to restrict us with partisanship.  Rather, each candidate or issue should be treated as a separate entity.  Regardless of the Democratic or Republican spin, voters have a responsibility to cross-over (party lines) in order to pick and choose whoever or whatever best represents their unique interests.

In June 1972, (the year before I was eligible to vote for the first time), the Watergate break-in of the Democratic National Committee headquarters took place.  It is possible that part of the motive for this blight on the concept of fair play was to find detrimental information on the democratic, candidate George McGovern.  The ensuing smear tactics made by these "dirty tricks" helped Richard Nixon get re-elected in one of the biggest landslides in American electoral history.

A VIP MAGNET SINCE 1965, THE BESMIRCHED  WATERGATE HOTEL IS NOW SINGULARLY ASSOCIATED WITH THE 1972 SCANDAL (AND ITS COVER-UP).  THE BREAK-IN LED TO 43 CONVICTIONS AND INCARCERATIONS OF NIXON'S CLOSEST CONFIDANTS...AND EVENTUALLY, TO THE PRESIDENT'S RESIGNATION (AUGUST 9, 1974).

When I was seventeen, my specific interest in the '72 election, (even though I was a spectator) was McGovern unseating Nixon from a second term.  My unique issue was ending the war in Vietnam, (I would be entering the draft in 1973).  Yes, the fear of getting shot-up in what seemed to be an unnecessary war was obliviously unappealing therefore I was overwhelmingly, for the anti-war McGovern.  Unfortunately, McGovern not only lost the election, was embarrassed by the margin of defeat but was beaten my a man whose name has become synonymous with being a crooked politician.

GEORGE McGOVERN (1922-2012) WAS A LONG-TIME SENATOR FROM SOUTH DAKOTA.  PRESIDENT JOHN KENNEDY ONCE CALLED HIM, "THE MOST DECENT MAN IN THE SENATE."  BUT BECAUSE OF HIS STUNNING LOSS IN THE 1972 ELECTION, HE SANK INTO POLITICAL OBLIVION. TWO WEEKS AGO, HE DIED AS A VIRTUAL UNKNOWN.

George McGovern was an Air Force pilot in WWII.  He flew thirty-five missions over German-occupied Europe and earned the Distinguished Flying Cross for heroism. He understood firsthand, the mental and physical toll of combat. As a politician, he wanted to use his intellect to convey his anti-war sentiments.

In Washington, as early as 1962, McGovern became an outspoken leader against U.S. involvement in Vietnam. An exemplar of liberalism, he included the following excerpt in a 1963 speech before the senate. "The current dilemma in Vietnam is a clear demonstration of the limitations of military power ... [Current U.S. involvement] is a policy of moral debacle and political defeat ... The trap we have fallen into there will haunt us in every corner of this revolutionary world if we do not properly appraise its lessons."

Unfortunately, McGovern's voice could not be heard over the explosions in that obscure corner of Southeast Asia.  In fact, the land was so remote that most combatants sent there, had little idea where they were going.   Instead, under the Lyndon Johnson administration, the war escalated.  In 1965, McGovern visited Vietnam and said, "I'm fed up to ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in."

Today's young voters could use a George McGovern or a Ronald Reagan to champion the cause of the people.  Our country is faced with intense economic and civil uncertainty and just when we need a knight in shining armor or a superman to lift us out of the morass and back into world prominence...we are left with two feeble choices.  Mr. Obama and Mr. Romney may as well be Jimmy Carter versus George W. Bush because regardless who "wins," I seriously doubt either of them has the right stuff to lead us towards prosperity. 

RONALD REAGAN WAS A SUPERMAN AND A REPUBLICAN.  I'M POSITIVE HE COULD  KEEP OUR MILITARY THREAT STRONG WHILE LEADING US OUT OF THE WOODS AT HOME.  AND DEMOCRATIC GEORGE McGOVERN WAS A KNIGHT IN SHINING ARMOR WHO WOULD HAVE KEPT OUR CHILDREN FROM GETTING KILLED IN IRAQ AND AFGHANISTAN.

Tomorrow's election will be between the bickering talking heads whose mumble-jumble left their series of  debates, a stalemate.  Content to dwell on finger-pointing neither man displayed any vision or a clear method out of country's continuing crisis. 

Four years ago, I voted for Mr. Obama.  I felt good about it...but not because I saw greatness in the man...but because John McCain was such an inferior choice that it felt like Obama was running unopposed.

This time, we don't have the same luxury.  The republicans again dropped the ball.  They had four years to groom someone for the White House and they came up with Mitt Romney.  So this time around, I'm more confused because both men seem equally inept for different reasons.  I really hate to tell first time voters to choose wisely because they have an impossible decision...to select which is the shiniest of the two turds.

Before we sink into defeatism, I hope our nation picks a winner.  If not, we'll need Kinky Friedman to come up with someone who could respond to; cit, cit, cit, ( C. I.T. = County In Trouble).

And please, take a moment to acknowledge the life of George McGovern who passed away last month.  With a name like McGovern, it would have been apt as well as poetic license for him to have been president.