1914 - 2014 - 2114

I have worked in the casino industry for thirty-four years. In that time, the area where I have separated myself from the crowd, is international relations.  While others in my position lack the patience or interest to breakdown the walls of our customers' ethnic, language and cultural differences, I have become a beacon of positive energy to legions of international fans.  My never-ending following (universal appeal) pops up almost daily and seeks me out because I single-handedly contradict the notion of the "Ugly American."

The Ugly American concept is simple; we travel abroad and arrogantly batter everyone over the head with how perfect the USA is...while implying that they are unimportant, uninteresting, less intelligent or lacking in ingenuity.

Atlantic City attracts a global clientele.  To get me through the average work day, while entertaining patrons, (and myself) I took the time to teach myself what I call, "Ten words in ten languages."  I admit this knowledge is superficial but when people expect all Americans to know NOTHING about their way of life, they are pleasantly surprised that I know anything!

It helps being a "storehouse of useless information" and having a good memory because this technique allows me to say SOMETHING in several tongues, (usually, hello, good luck and thank you...as well as numbers, colors and other random words).  Occasionally, in my spiel, I intentionally make a buffoon out of myself through mispronounciation...or just knowing I'm butchering the language with the wrong word, for comic effect.

Thanks to my Guru SAL, today's blog centers on the Hindi word for the number fourteen.  For the sake of simplicity, it is phonetically spelled C-H-A-R-D-E.  However, their version of the F-Bomb is C-H-O-D-E.  I can't tell you how much mileage I get toying with this little idiocyncrasy that no Ugly American would ever take the time to learn, see the humor in or bring to market.

My original idea was to reflect on the year 1914 and sight the significance that year had on the ten decades since.  But I was CHODED because 1914 was a pretty dull year. 

Yes 'Charde, (get it, it's Hindi for '14) had some good things happening like:

-   Ford Motors wages go from $2.40/hr (nine hour day), to $5.00/hr (eight hour day).

-   Panama Canal opened

-   Charlie Chaplin's tramp character debuts in, "AUTO KID RACES AT VENICE."

-   First successful blood transfusion (Brussels Belgium).

-   George Bernard Shaw's, "PYGMALION" debuts.

-   Coal mine collapse in Eccles West Virginia, 181 dead.

-   Mother's Day is established.

-   Babe Ruth debuts as a Boston Red Sox pitcher.

-   Greyhound Bus Lines open.

-   First airplane flight (beyond the sight of land)  Scotland to Norway.

-   Mahatma Gandhi's first arrest, campaigning for Indian rights in South Africa...chode.

-   Robert Goddard patents liquid rocket fuel...chode again !

-   First traffic light in USA, (E.  105th Street and Euclid) Cleveland Ohio.

-   Banditos Pancho Villa and Zapata overrun Mexico.

1914 also saw the deaths of George Westinghouse and John Muir. 

JOHN MUIR (1838-1914) IS FREQUENTLY OVER-LOOKED AS A GREAT AMERICAN HERO.  HE CHAMPIONED THE CAUSE OF PRESERVING OUR WILDERNESS WHILE HELPING TO ESTABLISH THE NATIONAL PARKS SYSTEM...GEORGE WESTINGHOUSE (1846-1914) BECAME FILTHY RICH DEVELOPING THE COMMERCIAL USE OF ELECTRICITY.  A RIVAL OF THOMAS EDISON, THEY BOTH DESTROYED NIKOLA TESLA (1856-1943) WHO MIGHT HAVE LACKED THE BUSINESS GUILE AND STREET SMARTS BUT WHO NONETHELESS INVISIONED ELECTRICAL POWER TO BE FREE FOR THE MASSES.

Some of the notable births of 1914 include;

-   George Reeves (TV's Superman).

-   Gypsy Rose Lee (Burlesque actress).

-   Ida Lupino  (Actress, director)

-   Bill Veeck (Baseball team owner, innovator).

-   Alec Guiness (Actor)

GEORGE REEVES (1914-1959).  HIS BIRTH MIGHT HAVE BEEN THE HIGHLIGHT OF THE YEAR.  HE STANDS OUT AS MY FAVORITE SUPER-HERO, (SORRY ANDREW AND THE REST OF YOU BATMAN FANS).  IF SUPERMAN WAS AROUND TODAY, I WONDER IF HE COULD STRAIGHTEN-OUT OUR MISGUIDED YOUTH AND THEIR BOGUS SENSE OF ENTITLEMENT...WITHOUT PUKING.

I purposely didn't mention World War I.  Yes, "the war to end all wars," dominated 1914's news.  It was such a chode-ing blight on that year and history it self...that all the positives mentioned above seem unimportant in comparison.

INCREDIBLY SAD, WORLD WAR I (1914-1918) FEATURED TRENCH WARFARE. THIS EXERCISE IN FUTILITY, FEATURED SOLDIERS FIGHTING FOR A FEW FEET OF UNIMPORTANT TERRITORY.  WHILE BEING SLAUGHTERED BY NEW MASS-KILLING TECHNOLOGY THAT WAS INCONVENIENTLY WAY AHEAD OF THE STRATEGIES THAT MIGHT PROTECT THEM.

I wonder what our world will be like a hundred years from now?  Will our greatest fear of computers taking over like in 1968's, "2001: A SPACE ODYSSEY," come true. 

YOU MAY RECALL, THE HAL 9000, (HEURISTICALLY PROGRAMMED ALGORITHMIC COMPUTER) TAKES OVER THE SPACE SHIP.  WHEN THE ASTRONAUT SAYS, "OPEN THE POD DOORS PLEASE, HAL."  THE COMPUTER ANSWERS, "I'M SORRY DAVE, I'M AFRAID I CAN'T DO THAT."

Ironically, many people are speculating that within the next hundred years, we will implant ourselves with computer chips and become exactly what we were the most afraid of...cybernetic robots.  How about 2114 bringing us flying cars for local travel? Or being beamed across oceans in seconds.  I say, it won't be far-fetched that our space program will place colonies on the moon, Mars etc. 

On the flip side, are we in chode-ing deep shit?  Will the other nations of the world band together to destroy the Ugly Americans? Or will a REAL conflict end all wars and threaten the planet's ability to survive?  Or will Earth be saved by aliens from a parallel universe who promise to improve our way of life, by ending hatred, curing disease and feeding every corner of our world? 

"THE TWILIGHT ZONE" FIRST AIRED ONE OF MY FAVORITE EPISODES, (MARCH 2 1962),  CALLED, "TO SERVE MAN."  IT FEATURED BENEVOLENT ALIENS WHO READ FROM A GREAT BOOK CLAIMING IT WOULD HELP OUR SOCIETY.  COUNTLESS HUMAN VOLUNTEERS BOARDED THEIR MOTHERSHIP FOR A BETTER LIFE IN OUTER SPACE...UNTIL CRYPTOLOGISTS DECIPHERED THE CONTENTS AS...A COOK BOOK.


Maybe in a hundred years, the babies being born now will reap the fruit of our kid's brilliance.  Wouldn't it be wonderful to be confident that our great grandchildren will realize a better civilization that we could ever imagine through the hard work and genius of our grandchildren.  If not, when the good visitors from Planet Xenon arrive, I hope future Edelblums will be sharp enough to learn a few inter-galactic phrases, to disspell the notion of the Ugly Earthling.

THE STOREHOUSE OF USELESS INFORMATION STRIKES AGAIN !

Yesterday was not only our dog Roxy's third birthday but it was the day that the prematurely anoited kings of professional football were dethroned, prior to coronation.

Deep in the heart of Giants territory, I ventured up to Central Jersey to a Super Bowl party thrown by my lifelong friends, the Zimbiodelic's. The house also served as a convalescent center as many mutual friends met to wish ZYMBOT the host, a speedy recovery from kneecap replacement surgery...ouchies!

In that hostile environment...I of course was the only person rooting for the Patriots--so as I always suggest: find out who I like and bet the other way.

On the brighter side, the patient was cheery from the company and the result of the game. His upbeat demeanor made it easier on his wife FLOWGLO...who throughout the day was her usual lovable self and cordial hostess.

I was enjoying the clam dip with RBOY when he told me that he recently had a get together with other old friends from the neighborhood. They wound up at a schoolyard and shot baskets. He made the point that despite being 53 or so...everyone's personality on the court was a consistant throw-back to being 14.

RBOY said, "Despite the best and worse that life has to offer, we can't change the root of who we are. The selfish friend who became a great businessman still never passed the ball, the cool dude whose life has been riddled with addictions and dead end jobs was still a show-off, the lazy sloth after two divorces still played no defense and stood still on offense waiting for a pass, the whiner was still petty and cried foul too often, the tough guy played dirty and the space-case lost interest right away and played video games on his cell-phone."

I guess what I forgot to ask RBOY was--how are you the same? I think he would have said that his jumper, a step inside the foul line, is still deadly. I also should have asked about me. I really don't know about my hoops personality but I do know one aspect of my life that everyone at the party has come to expect.

I am a STOREHOUSE OF USELESS INFORMATION, if it doesn't matter, I know it. And in small doses, like once every few years, my talent for superficial, free association is greatly appreciated.

The day's first bone of contention was: my mentioning the military draft prior to Vietnam... during peace time.
ZYMBOT challenged this assertion so I pointed out that many celebrities and sports figures had to put their careers on hold, to serve. I used NFL Hall of Famer Paul Hornung's story about his coach Vince Lombardi personally calling President Kennedy to use a favor, to get Hornung a weekend pass to play in the 1961 championship game, (it was called that prior to being dubbed Super Bowl).

He didn't like that example because he couldn't believe that there was ever a draft during peacetime. So I mentioned Elvis Presley.
One of the women said, "Elvis doesn't count because he was drafted during the Korean War."
I regret not not sticking to my guns because he was a nobody in '51-'53. I reseached it on Wikipedia and found out that he was drafted December of '57 and was inducted into the army March '58. In September of that year, Elvid was sent to Germany where he was stationed for the next 18 months.

My second nonsense nugget made a lot of people scoff: The Outerbridge Crossing that connects the Tottenville section of Staten Island New York with Perth Amboy New Jersey is named after someone whose name is Outerbridge.

Most people seem to think that because it was the most southern point in New York or that it was the last outpost in the state, it was named the "Outer" Bridge. But its the Outer Bridge Crossing. More specifically Outerbridge is indeed one word. I wasn't prepared to tell the whole story at the party but "Instant Recall Edelblum" (me), is ready now.

The Outerbridge Crossing was named in honor of Eugenius H. Outerbridge. He was the first chairman of the Port Authority. The "crossing" was opened on June 29, 1928 and in 2006 32,438,000 vehicles came across it.

After finishing my column, to belatedly honor my dog's birthday, I offered her a treat. She rejected it. I guess because I missed HER party, she's wasn't interested in my trifle. Either that or she smelled Cody and Casey, (two dogs who were at the Zimbiodelic shindig) and hates me for seeing other pups behind her back.

CASABLANCA vs LILY PONS...WHO SCOOPED WHO?

On my drive to and from work, I frequently listen to classical music on WMFT, found locally at 93.9 FM. I not only find it relaxing but it seems to stimulate my imagination...which leads to interesting things for me to write about.

I especially enjoy Bill McGlaughlin, the Peabody award-winning host of the "Exploring Music" program. It airs weeknights at 7:PM, and in addition to his insights, he mixes the music with, the history of the piece, its composer and/or its performers.

Last week, he was taking E-Mail requests and a listener wanted to hear Lily Pons sing La Marseillaise (the French national anthem). Even though I don't understand the words, I have always found that tune to rousing.

So I was thrilled...until he said, "After exhaustive research, no recording could be found of her singing it." But Mr. McGlaughlin did go on to explain the unique circumstance that made her performance special.

Lily Pons (1898-1976) was a French-born opera superstar. After getting "discovered," she came to the U. S. and became the New York Metropolitan Opera's principle soprano from 1931-1960.

While in Paris during the German occupation of WWII, Ms. Pons performed an Italian opera (I'm sorry, I didn't catch the title) to a capacity house that included German generals and other dignitaries of the Third Reich. After several curtain calls, she returned to the stage draped in a French flag and sang La Marseillaise...despite the fact that the Germans had banned it.

McGlaughlin neglected to mention what retributions were suffered by the performers. As well as the previously dormant, overwhelmingly French audience, whose patriotism was spurred by the impromptu encore. Hopefully, there weren't any?

The host also failed to give the date of this performance. Which leads me to one of my favorite movies, "CASABLANCA." In a film that featured so many great performances and so many memorable lines, its easy to overlook the singing of La Marseillaise. However, you may recall towards the end, German officers took over Sam's piano and sang their regimental songs at the bar. The anti-Nazi majority bowed their heads in defeat until Victor Laszlo instructed the band to play the French anthem. The band's singer became energized and led the crowd in drowning-out the Germans, ala Lily Pons.

So I pose the age old question; what came first...did Lily Pons steal the screen writer's idea or vice versa?

Your decision should be made easier by a couple of historic facts: The German occupation of France started in June of 1940 and Casablanca, with actual stock footage of the take-over, came out in 1942.

Also, remember after Rick's drunken flashback of the Germans marching into Paris he said to Ilsa, "I remember every detail, they wore gray and you wore blue." Later he also said, "We'll always have Paris."

So the cat is out of the bag, the screenwriter got his idea from Ms. Pons.

Therefore, Lily Pons, in addition to her lifetime achievements on stage should also be remembered for her heroism, patriotism and inspiration.

Now that I wet your whistle, go ahead and Google, La Marseillaise. Its history alone is fascinating (it was written 1n 1792) and wait till you read the English translation of the lyrics, (we'll water our crops with the blood of our enemies), is just one example.

As you know "MORE GLIB ThAN PROFOUND," prides itself on being non-political...but think about it, how can those weaselly Frogs face each other, especially when you consider their war-time road-record...while zestfully singing their anthem.

Still, its a catchy ditty, to me. So go ahead check it out, I think you'll like it too.