Monday, August 18, 2008


Leave it to me to find a negative spin on Olympian Michael Phelps' impossible mission to win eight gold medals.


First, I will not engage in a debate whether Phelps is the world's greatest athlete, Olympian or swimmer. I feel his accomplishments speak for them self and at this moment, he's the greatest thing since sliced bread and deserves every ounce of his celebrity. Of course he will always be remembered, but in my opinion, his feat will lose its impact within a couple of months and will continue to be less relevant until 2012 Olympic Games spike-up interest in him.

My problem with Michael Phelps however, is right now. It concerns my signature statement greeting of: "Good evening Mr. Phelps." I stole that catch-phrase, in good faith, from the 1966-1973 TV show on CBS; "MISSION IMPOSSIBLE." The show is old and rarely seen in re-runs so that most people don't remember Peter Graves, Barbara Bain, Martin Landau and an ensemble cast using covert CIA-like tactics to keep the world safe...usually from Soviet and/or Cold-War related antagonists. THE WAY I SEE IT, I MUST HAVE EXCLUSIVELY WATCHED THE SHOW IN 1967 and 1968 BECAUSE THE MAIN CHARACTERS ABOVE ARE THE ONLY ONES I REMEMBER. UPON DEEPER EXAMINATION, I DISCOVERED THAT THERE WERE SOME OLDER ONES PLUS SEVERAL NEWER CAST MEMBERS. I WAS ESPECIALLY SHOCKED THAT IN 1969, LEONARD NIMOY TOOK MARTIN LANDAU'S SPOT.

I liked to use, "Good evening Mr. Phelps," as a random greeting to my friends. My peeps (anywhere near my age) found it amusing and some even used it on me. It seemed to have eternal appeal...until the stupid Olympics rolled around. Now I hesitate on using it because people relate the phrase to Michael Phelps.

I'm not smart enough to find a new line that is as clever as: Good evening Mr. Phelps. Plus I'm too stubborn to just forget about it, and too set in my ways to use other "MISSION IMPOSSIBLE" lines like; A) Your mission should you decide to accept it, B) Should any team member be caught or killed, the secretary will disavow any knowledge of your actions, and C) This tape will self-destruct in five seconds.

Right now all I can do is cry myself to sleep and repeat a million times...damn you Michael Phelps. Damn you for infringing on my creative genius.

1 comment:

Jason said...

I liked better the guy who was the MI team leader before Mr. Phelps. What was his name?? I think it starts with an "A."

MI hit the air just as The Man From Uncle was getting canceled. Uncle was a clever show (I saw an episode not too long ago and the sophistication and use of subtle innuendo really surprised me.) But Mission took it to a new level.

Back then we had so much time to enjoy TV - we didn't have to waste our time on the Internet.